Queer | Seth/Ryan | R
Jul. 17th, 2006 08:15 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
myficsTitle: Queer
Pairing: Ryan/Seth, history of Seth/OMC
Rating: R
Word Count: 2,270
Beta: Thank you so, so, so, so, SO, SO much to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
ankh_definition.
Notes: Written for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
theoc_slash's Quotes Challenge. My quote was #19, "The only queer people are those who don’t love anybody - Rita Mae Brown"
Warnings: Mention of a gay-bashing that happened in the past, may make some people uncomfortable, but it's important to the story, so I hope that doesn't deter you from reading this.
19. The only queer people are those who don’t love anybody - Rita Mae Brown
Seth was eleven the first time Luke called him queer.
“Ow!” Seth said, looking up from his notebook. He’d been doodling and something large had just hit him on the back of the head. It turned out it was Luke’s shoulder.
“What’s the matter, queer? Did something hit you?”
Seth looked around and saw that there were no teachers nearby to help him.
“No.” He shook his head.
“Good little queer boy,” Luke said maliciously, like he was telling a puppy it was a good dog for going outside to use the bathroom.
Seth had never heard that word before, but when he got home, he looked it up in his dad’s dictionary.
Imagine his surprise when he realized that for once in his life, Luke was, shockingly, correct.
*
Seth was fourteen the first time he told anyone he thought he was gay.
It was before Ryan, before his life changed. Before Ryan it used to be just him and his boat, and sometimes his grandpa would take him out on his yacht.
Seth didn’t like the yacht as much as he liked his little catamaran; mainly because he couldn’t work sails, couldn’t steer, couldn’t do much of anything, really. His grandpa had someone who did that for them.
Seth had been on the boat tons of times before, but that day was different. It was the day that his grandpa hired someone young to work on the yacht. He was only about nineteen, and he was the most gorgeous guy Seth had ever seen. Seth spent most of the day staring at the guy, Jack.
Eventually, his grandpa asked him what was so fascinating, and Seth mumbled something about Jack, and how he was kind of hot.
Caleb stared at him, scandalized, and hissed through his teeth, “Don’t you dare talk like that, Seth.”
The next day, his grandpa hired a girl to hang out with him. Her name was Jill, and Seth laughed at the irony. They ended up playing Playstation all day and when she left that evening, she asked him if he had a boyfriend. He shook his head and she smiled.
“Whoever you end up with, he’ll be lucky to have you,” she said, before kissing him on his forehead and leaving.
*
Seth was fifteen the day he met his soul mate.
He knew he was likely the world’s biggest girl for saying “soul mate” and that all of that was probably bullshit, but Ryan walked into his life and Seth just instantly knew.
The night of Holly’s party, when he saw Summer hanging all over Ryan, he was so pissed that he pushed Ryan away—literally.
That wasn’t how it was supposed to go. He was supposed to meet his soul mate and they were supposed to love him back.
Ryan couldn’t like Summer. He couldn’t like girls. He was supposed to like Seth.
*
Seth was eighteen the first time he kissed a boy.
He was drunk and he was stupid and he was all alone in Rhode Island, with no one but Summer to talk to; and she hadn’t spoken to him since they broke up. Like an idiot, he went to a party and some guy spent the better part of the night cruising him. The guy kind of looked a little like Ryan, and the next thing Seth new, the guy had his hands down Seth’s pants, and he was kissing him like he was trying to suck out Seth’s life force through his mouth, like he was Imhotep in The Mummy or something.
It was hot and Seth got off, but when he came, he called out Ryan’s name. The guy wasn’t too happy about it, and ran out of the room before Seth could regain the ability to do more than blink dumbly.
It was not the way he had wanted his first sexual experience with a guy to go, but by the time he’d sobered up enough to realize it, the night had become nothing more than a blurry memory.
*
Seth was twenty-two when he finally came out.
His parents both ran out to join PFLAG, but Ryan wouldn’t look him in the eye for two weeks.
Seth should’ve known that was coming, but some how, he’d convinced himself that Ryan wouldn’t care.
A month later, Ryan went to a PFLAG meeting after Sandy pulled the patented Cohen skills on him. When he got home, he hugged Seth and told him that it was all going to be okay.
Seth knew that it wouldn’t, but he hugged Ryan back and thanked both Jesus and Moses for inventing support groups.
*
Seth was twenty-four when Ryan kissed him.
He wasn’t really expecting it. Hell, he wasn’t even expecting to see Ryan that day. He lived twenty minutes away from Newport in his own studio apartment, writing for the local newspaper while he tried to come up with a new idea for a comic. Ryan was working for the Newport Group.
And then suddenly, there Ryan was, in his doorway, and before Seth could say, “Come in,” Ryan had grabbed him and smashed their lips together.
It wasn’t the way Seth had imagined his first kiss with Ryan would be like, but it was still pretty much the greatest thing he’d ever had happen to him.
And Seth was pretty sure he’d never forget what happened after that, because it was him, and it was Ryan, and it was all pretty wonderful until the next morning when Seth woke up and Ryan was leaving.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“Home.”
And after that, Ryan went back to acting weird again.
And as if that wasn’t bad enough, Seth’s ass was really, really sore.
The Big Gay Lovin’ hurt.
*
Seth was twenty-five when he pulled a coffee cart on Ryan.
Granted, it wasn’t an actual coffee cart, but the symbolism was what was important, damn it.
He told Ryan to meet him at what had once been The Bait Shop, but was now just a regular karaoke bar.
Inside, it was fairly quiet, most people were talking quietly watching whoever was singing at the time.
Ryan ordered them both a beer and they sat down at a table.
“Why’d you call me?” Ryan asked, twisting his bottle in his hands.
“Just wanted to hang out,” Seth said. “Nothing better than a couple of beers, a friend, and some seriously minty singing.”
“You’re one to talk about mintiness,” Ryan said before taking a pull of his beer.
Seth shrugged. “Then I should probably join in the minty singing, huh?”
“What?” Ryan asked, eyes wide.
Seth grinned and said, “Mic’s open. I’m minty. Minty singing is what this place is about. I gotta go, man, it’s my Mecca.”
“I thought your Mecca was a Barbara Streisand concert?” Ryan grinned.
Seth pushed Ryan lightly as he got up. “Don’t be such a bastard.”
He walked over to the guy in charge and whispered what song he wanted to sing, then climbed up on stage.
“This is for Ryan,” he said into the mic, just as the opening chords of “Open Arms” began to play. He added, “Only for you would I do Journey, man.”
He wished he could see Ryan’s face while he sang, but their table was pretty far back and the spotlight was right in his eye.
Seth knew he couldn’t sing. His singing voice alone probably should’ve gotten him disqualified for membership at the local queer club. But he hoped Ryan would like it anyway.
“SO NOW I COME TO YOU WITH OPEN ARMS!” he bellowed into the mic. He saw several people right in front of the stage cover their ears. He thought he heard someone booing. But he didn’t care. He just kept singing, or at least doing his pathetic excuse for singing, into the mic.
He saw someone motion make a “cut him off” motion to the guy controlling the karaoke machine and he shot the guy a look. The guy just shrugged and let him keep going.
He finished with a big flourish and was promptly booed off stage, but he didn’t care, because Ryan hadn’t left in embarrassment, which was probably a good sign.
Seth sat back down and took a drink of his beer. “That was exhilarating,” he said breathlessly. “You should try it, minty or no.”
“No, Seth,” Ryan said angrily.
“Okay, okay, you don’t have to sing. Geez, it was just a—“
“No, Seth. I mean…minty or no. My answer is no.”
Seth looked down at his hands. “But what about…”
“That was…something that I shouldn’t have done.”
“But…but you liked it. Don’t tell me you didn’t, Ryan, I know you did. I saw your enjoyment, actually. Or tasted it, more like. Remember? You ca—“
“Seth,” Ryan snapped.
Seth swallowed hard and whispered, “Ryan, I know you did.”
“Even if I did, Seth, I…I’m not like that. I’m not like you.”
“Not queer?” Seth said loudly.
“Shhh!” Ryan snapped.
Several people around them stared.
“Don’t shush me, Ryan! Apparently I’m the only queer here, so—“
“No, you’re not,” a guy said a few tables over.
Seth held up one hand distractedly and said, “Solidarity,” to the guy, then turned back to Ryan. “Apparently I’m the only queer at this table, so what’s it matter? Why are you so afraid of it? Is it the word? Because I can use another word. Gay works. Minty is good.”
“It’s not the word, Seth.”
“Is it just that you don’t love me or—“
“It’s not like that, Seth.”
“What are you so afraid of then, Ryan? ‘Cause I don’t get it.”
Ryan grabbed Seth’s arm and started dragging him outside.
“Lay a finger on that boy and I’ll kick your ass!” the guy from a few tables over said as they passed.
“Don’t worry! I can totally take him!” Seth shouted back.
Ryan snorted.
“Fine, we’re outside and you’ve effectively ruined the evening. Now please tell me what the hell is wrong with you.”
“Seth it’s not…”
“What?”
“It’s not what you think.”
“Then what, Ryan? Because I’m really getting sick of this.”
Ryan slumped down onto a bench on the edge of the pier and whispered, “When I was eight, Trey and I were hanging around the playground at his school, and these guys were playing something called ‘Tag the Queer.’”
“Never heard of it.”
“Good,” Ryan said. “Basically, they kept hitting this guy going, ‘tag, you’re it. Tag, you’re it. Tag, Queer-Boy. Aren’t you going to hit back?’ And when he didn’t, they knocked him down and started kicking him. And Trey watched them and laughed and said, ‘See that, Little Brother? That’s what happens to fags.’ And then when the guy left, his face was just a giant bruise, Seth. I couldn’t make out anything on his face.”
“That’s horrible,” Seth whispered in choked tones.
“And when you came out…God, Seth. All I could do was picture you and those guys and…Seth, I never want that to happen to you.”
“It won’t,” Seth said, putting his hand on Ryan’s shoulder.
“You don’t know that, Seth. There are a lot of sick fucks in this world. And I just kept picturing them doing that to you, and…I couldn’t stand it, Seth. But then I went to that meeting and they kept talking about progress and shit and I thought maybe they were right. Maybe people were past that.”
“But why…?”
“That day. When I came to your place. I—I was driving home from work and I heard on the radio that someone in your neighborhood had been beaten to death and they thought it was a hate crime. And I just…God, Seth.” Ryan’s face was crinkled with pain. “I thought you were dead. Do you know what that did to me? I couldn’t even breathe the entire way to your apartment. And then…there you were, perfectly fine, and I was just so…relieved. And I…afterwards, I…God, Seth. That night…it was…”
“Perfect?” Seth offered.
“Yeah.”
“So why--?”
Ryan looked down at his hands. “You know how you always say I’m the brave one?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, turns out, you’re braver. Because you’ve at least got the balls to be honest. Seth, I kept thinking about that day on the playground, and I thought about that happening to me, and I just…I can’t, Seth. I can’t be ‘queer’.”
Seth turned to face Ryan and whispered, “What’s queer is to be in love and not let yourself be with them over someone else’s problem.”
He leaned in closer and waited to see if Ryan would push him away. He didn’t, so Seth pressed their lips together softly. “Fuck the rest of the world, okay? This isn’t about them. This is about me and you.”
“Seth, I –”
“Ryan, not to sound corny, but I’m here, I’m queer, and they can just fucking deal with it, okay? Because I’m not letting them keep me away from you.”
“But what if—?”
“Stop ‘what if’ing’ and let yourself do this. Come on, Ryan. Be queer. Fuck ‘em.”
“Queer,” Ryan repeated slowly.
Seth wasn’t sure how Ryan made that word sound sexy, but he did.
“Please,” Seth added.
“Queer,” Ryan said again, this time more firmly.
Like he was making a statement.
“Queer?” Seth asked, trying not to sound too hopeful.
Ryan’s head gave the slightest of nods and he whispered, “Queer,” before pressing his lips to Seth’s.
Fuck the world. They had each other.
END
Pairing: Ryan/Seth, history of Seth/OMC
Rating: R
Word Count: 2,270
Beta: Thank you so, so, so, so, SO, SO much to
ankh_definition.Notes: Written for
theoc_slash's Quotes Challenge. My quote was #19, "The only queer people are those who don’t love anybody - Rita Mae Brown"Warnings: Mention of a gay-bashing that happened in the past, may make some people uncomfortable, but it's important to the story, so I hope that doesn't deter you from reading this.
19. The only queer people are those who don’t love anybody - Rita Mae Brown
Seth was eleven the first time Luke called him queer.
“Ow!” Seth said, looking up from his notebook. He’d been doodling and something large had just hit him on the back of the head. It turned out it was Luke’s shoulder.
“What’s the matter, queer? Did something hit you?”
Seth looked around and saw that there were no teachers nearby to help him.
“No.” He shook his head.
“Good little queer boy,” Luke said maliciously, like he was telling a puppy it was a good dog for going outside to use the bathroom.
Seth had never heard that word before, but when he got home, he looked it up in his dad’s dictionary.
Imagine his surprise when he realized that for once in his life, Luke was, shockingly, correct.
Seth was fourteen the first time he told anyone he thought he was gay.
It was before Ryan, before his life changed. Before Ryan it used to be just him and his boat, and sometimes his grandpa would take him out on his yacht.
Seth didn’t like the yacht as much as he liked his little catamaran; mainly because he couldn’t work sails, couldn’t steer, couldn’t do much of anything, really. His grandpa had someone who did that for them.
Seth had been on the boat tons of times before, but that day was different. It was the day that his grandpa hired someone young to work on the yacht. He was only about nineteen, and he was the most gorgeous guy Seth had ever seen. Seth spent most of the day staring at the guy, Jack.
Eventually, his grandpa asked him what was so fascinating, and Seth mumbled something about Jack, and how he was kind of hot.
Caleb stared at him, scandalized, and hissed through his teeth, “Don’t you dare talk like that, Seth.”
The next day, his grandpa hired a girl to hang out with him. Her name was Jill, and Seth laughed at the irony. They ended up playing Playstation all day and when she left that evening, she asked him if he had a boyfriend. He shook his head and she smiled.
“Whoever you end up with, he’ll be lucky to have you,” she said, before kissing him on his forehead and leaving.
Seth was fifteen the day he met his soul mate.
He knew he was likely the world’s biggest girl for saying “soul mate” and that all of that was probably bullshit, but Ryan walked into his life and Seth just instantly knew.
The night of Holly’s party, when he saw Summer hanging all over Ryan, he was so pissed that he pushed Ryan away—literally.
That wasn’t how it was supposed to go. He was supposed to meet his soul mate and they were supposed to love him back.
Ryan couldn’t like Summer. He couldn’t like girls. He was supposed to like Seth.
Seth was eighteen the first time he kissed a boy.
He was drunk and he was stupid and he was all alone in Rhode Island, with no one but Summer to talk to; and she hadn’t spoken to him since they broke up. Like an idiot, he went to a party and some guy spent the better part of the night cruising him. The guy kind of looked a little like Ryan, and the next thing Seth new, the guy had his hands down Seth’s pants, and he was kissing him like he was trying to suck out Seth’s life force through his mouth, like he was Imhotep in The Mummy or something.
It was hot and Seth got off, but when he came, he called out Ryan’s name. The guy wasn’t too happy about it, and ran out of the room before Seth could regain the ability to do more than blink dumbly.
It was not the way he had wanted his first sexual experience with a guy to go, but by the time he’d sobered up enough to realize it, the night had become nothing more than a blurry memory.
Seth was twenty-two when he finally came out.
His parents both ran out to join PFLAG, but Ryan wouldn’t look him in the eye for two weeks.
Seth should’ve known that was coming, but some how, he’d convinced himself that Ryan wouldn’t care.
A month later, Ryan went to a PFLAG meeting after Sandy pulled the patented Cohen skills on him. When he got home, he hugged Seth and told him that it was all going to be okay.
Seth knew that it wouldn’t, but he hugged Ryan back and thanked both Jesus and Moses for inventing support groups.
Seth was twenty-four when Ryan kissed him.
He wasn’t really expecting it. Hell, he wasn’t even expecting to see Ryan that day. He lived twenty minutes away from Newport in his own studio apartment, writing for the local newspaper while he tried to come up with a new idea for a comic. Ryan was working for the Newport Group.
And then suddenly, there Ryan was, in his doorway, and before Seth could say, “Come in,” Ryan had grabbed him and smashed their lips together.
It wasn’t the way Seth had imagined his first kiss with Ryan would be like, but it was still pretty much the greatest thing he’d ever had happen to him.
And Seth was pretty sure he’d never forget what happened after that, because it was him, and it was Ryan, and it was all pretty wonderful until the next morning when Seth woke up and Ryan was leaving.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“Home.”
And after that, Ryan went back to acting weird again.
And as if that wasn’t bad enough, Seth’s ass was really, really sore.
The Big Gay Lovin’ hurt.
Seth was twenty-five when he pulled a coffee cart on Ryan.
Granted, it wasn’t an actual coffee cart, but the symbolism was what was important, damn it.
He told Ryan to meet him at what had once been The Bait Shop, but was now just a regular karaoke bar.
Inside, it was fairly quiet, most people were talking quietly watching whoever was singing at the time.
Ryan ordered them both a beer and they sat down at a table.
“Why’d you call me?” Ryan asked, twisting his bottle in his hands.
“Just wanted to hang out,” Seth said. “Nothing better than a couple of beers, a friend, and some seriously minty singing.”
“You’re one to talk about mintiness,” Ryan said before taking a pull of his beer.
Seth shrugged. “Then I should probably join in the minty singing, huh?”
“What?” Ryan asked, eyes wide.
Seth grinned and said, “Mic’s open. I’m minty. Minty singing is what this place is about. I gotta go, man, it’s my Mecca.”
“I thought your Mecca was a Barbara Streisand concert?” Ryan grinned.
Seth pushed Ryan lightly as he got up. “Don’t be such a bastard.”
He walked over to the guy in charge and whispered what song he wanted to sing, then climbed up on stage.
“This is for Ryan,” he said into the mic, just as the opening chords of “Open Arms” began to play. He added, “Only for you would I do Journey, man.”
He wished he could see Ryan’s face while he sang, but their table was pretty far back and the spotlight was right in his eye.
Seth knew he couldn’t sing. His singing voice alone probably should’ve gotten him disqualified for membership at the local queer club. But he hoped Ryan would like it anyway.
“SO NOW I COME TO YOU WITH OPEN ARMS!” he bellowed into the mic. He saw several people right in front of the stage cover their ears. He thought he heard someone booing. But he didn’t care. He just kept singing, or at least doing his pathetic excuse for singing, into the mic.
He saw someone motion make a “cut him off” motion to the guy controlling the karaoke machine and he shot the guy a look. The guy just shrugged and let him keep going.
He finished with a big flourish and was promptly booed off stage, but he didn’t care, because Ryan hadn’t left in embarrassment, which was probably a good sign.
Seth sat back down and took a drink of his beer. “That was exhilarating,” he said breathlessly. “You should try it, minty or no.”
“No, Seth,” Ryan said angrily.
“Okay, okay, you don’t have to sing. Geez, it was just a—“
“No, Seth. I mean…minty or no. My answer is no.”
Seth looked down at his hands. “But what about…”
“That was…something that I shouldn’t have done.”
“But…but you liked it. Don’t tell me you didn’t, Ryan, I know you did. I saw your enjoyment, actually. Or tasted it, more like. Remember? You ca—“
“Seth,” Ryan snapped.
Seth swallowed hard and whispered, “Ryan, I know you did.”
“Even if I did, Seth, I…I’m not like that. I’m not like you.”
“Not queer?” Seth said loudly.
“Shhh!” Ryan snapped.
Several people around them stared.
“Don’t shush me, Ryan! Apparently I’m the only queer here, so—“
“No, you’re not,” a guy said a few tables over.
Seth held up one hand distractedly and said, “Solidarity,” to the guy, then turned back to Ryan. “Apparently I’m the only queer at this table, so what’s it matter? Why are you so afraid of it? Is it the word? Because I can use another word. Gay works. Minty is good.”
“It’s not the word, Seth.”
“Is it just that you don’t love me or—“
“It’s not like that, Seth.”
“What are you so afraid of then, Ryan? ‘Cause I don’t get it.”
Ryan grabbed Seth’s arm and started dragging him outside.
“Lay a finger on that boy and I’ll kick your ass!” the guy from a few tables over said as they passed.
“Don’t worry! I can totally take him!” Seth shouted back.
Ryan snorted.
“Fine, we’re outside and you’ve effectively ruined the evening. Now please tell me what the hell is wrong with you.”
“Seth it’s not…”
“What?”
“It’s not what you think.”
“Then what, Ryan? Because I’m really getting sick of this.”
Ryan slumped down onto a bench on the edge of the pier and whispered, “When I was eight, Trey and I were hanging around the playground at his school, and these guys were playing something called ‘Tag the Queer.’”
“Never heard of it.”
“Good,” Ryan said. “Basically, they kept hitting this guy going, ‘tag, you’re it. Tag, you’re it. Tag, Queer-Boy. Aren’t you going to hit back?’ And when he didn’t, they knocked him down and started kicking him. And Trey watched them and laughed and said, ‘See that, Little Brother? That’s what happens to fags.’ And then when the guy left, his face was just a giant bruise, Seth. I couldn’t make out anything on his face.”
“That’s horrible,” Seth whispered in choked tones.
“And when you came out…God, Seth. All I could do was picture you and those guys and…Seth, I never want that to happen to you.”
“It won’t,” Seth said, putting his hand on Ryan’s shoulder.
“You don’t know that, Seth. There are a lot of sick fucks in this world. And I just kept picturing them doing that to you, and…I couldn’t stand it, Seth. But then I went to that meeting and they kept talking about progress and shit and I thought maybe they were right. Maybe people were past that.”
“But why…?”
“That day. When I came to your place. I—I was driving home from work and I heard on the radio that someone in your neighborhood had been beaten to death and they thought it was a hate crime. And I just…God, Seth.” Ryan’s face was crinkled with pain. “I thought you were dead. Do you know what that did to me? I couldn’t even breathe the entire way to your apartment. And then…there you were, perfectly fine, and I was just so…relieved. And I…afterwards, I…God, Seth. That night…it was…”
“Perfect?” Seth offered.
“Yeah.”
“So why--?”
Ryan looked down at his hands. “You know how you always say I’m the brave one?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, turns out, you’re braver. Because you’ve at least got the balls to be honest. Seth, I kept thinking about that day on the playground, and I thought about that happening to me, and I just…I can’t, Seth. I can’t be ‘queer’.”
Seth turned to face Ryan and whispered, “What’s queer is to be in love and not let yourself be with them over someone else’s problem.”
He leaned in closer and waited to see if Ryan would push him away. He didn’t, so Seth pressed their lips together softly. “Fuck the rest of the world, okay? This isn’t about them. This is about me and you.”
“Seth, I –”
“Ryan, not to sound corny, but I’m here, I’m queer, and they can just fucking deal with it, okay? Because I’m not letting them keep me away from you.”
“But what if—?”
“Stop ‘what if’ing’ and let yourself do this. Come on, Ryan. Be queer. Fuck ‘em.”
“Queer,” Ryan repeated slowly.
Seth wasn’t sure how Ryan made that word sound sexy, but he did.
“Please,” Seth added.
“Queer,” Ryan said again, this time more firmly.
Like he was making a statement.
“Queer?” Seth asked, trying not to sound too hopeful.
Ryan’s head gave the slightest of nods and he whispered, “Queer,” before pressing his lips to Seth’s.
Fuck the world. They had each other.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 01:49 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 02:08 am (UTC)I used to hate the word "queer" too, until I started questioning my own self. Now that I am not sure what I am, I just know I'm not straight, I actually like the word "queer" for it, because it's sort of all-encompassing. I don't know if I'm bi or what, but I know I'm not straight, so I know that I'm "queer" and that's what I tell people.
Um...I'm sorry. You didn't need to know that. I rambled. Sorry.
Long story short, thank you. I'm glad you liked it. :)
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 05:16 am (UTC):)
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 05:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 05:17 am (UTC)This was good.
Loved the Imhotep reference.
Solidarity my brotha!
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 05:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 06:41 am (UTC)Speaking of which, I really liked how you portrayed him in this story. He's a deeply tormented character, or so the first few scenes until he comes out lead us to believe, but he's also very sure of himself and I'm thinking here of the karaoke singing. I liked his nonchalence and, in a way, his resignation to the fact that Ryan doesn't feel for him as he hoped he would.
In what concerns Ryan, I have to admit I didn't like him as much. I suppose it is conclusive with what we've seen form him in the series, but the whole living in the past and harbouring all those irrational fears, not to mention regrets, bugs me. As an author, short of writing him OOC, you could but write him this way and as such, this isn't a critique. It's more like a rant.
Style-wise, this was really nice. Short and to the point at first, mapping Seth's life and his coming into who he is sexually, then slowly moving into the more lenghty, the more complicated with Ryan's arrival. I almost didn't see where canon becomes fanon (and I'm thinking here of the boys' future) because the style is so based on quick jabs of information, like glimpses of their world. You don't waste time mapping out his entire past relationships and you do the same regarding his relationship with Ryan. Plus, leaving us to imagine exactly what went on that night between them does wonders for the readers' interest.
All in all, I really enjoyed this. It's been a while since I could find something concise, precise and exciting to read in this fandom. Good job!
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 06:50 am (UTC)I'm glad you liked it though, because I was really scared to write something like this. I'm so used to writing fluff and smut that writing something like this really scared me. :)
Thanks. ♥
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 07:54 am (UTC)I bet it can be scary writing something like this and while I do like fluff and happy smut, this was a breath of fresh air and maturity.
Really enjoyed it.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 08:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 08:44 am (UTC)Also? Loved, loved, loved the fact you used Queer from Seth's and Ryan's mouth.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 05:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 10:21 am (UTC)Hmmm....
Loved! I agree with all the comments from above. You are fab!
Your friendly neighbourhood mod.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 05:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 10:22 pm (UTC)Oh how I love these two...congratulations on making me love them more.
no subject
Date: 2006-07-18 10:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 01:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 01:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 12:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-19 12:26 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-20 03:02 pm (UTC)How can you write this well?!?!!??!
Ryan's such a doofus, I love it.
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Date: 2006-07-20 05:20 pm (UTC)I'm glad you liked it. :)
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Date: 2006-07-23 02:18 pm (UTC)This was sooooo cute. I loved the structure. Though as you said, it shifts from one style to another in the last section.. it works :)
I'm glad you decided to post this
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Date: 2006-07-23 08:10 pm (UTC)Thanks.
(Though I still say it's complete crap. :-/)
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Date: 2006-07-23 08:22 pm (UTC)(And it's not crap - give yourself a break; it's pretty good and kindof adorable)
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Date: 2006-07-23 08:43 pm (UTC)It's the only thing I know that works. :/
HI, MARTHA!!!! *offers her an ice cream cone*
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Date: 2006-07-24 07:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-07-24 08:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-09-06 12:15 pm (UTC)I was reading it again because I'm such a fan of this piece! I love the final draft and how canon the characters are!
Great job, my love :D
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Date: 2006-09-07 09:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-06-20 10:08 pm (UTC)pure coincidence, I was looking for a ryan/seth 'coffee table moment' fic!
and found this!
MADE OF LOVE!!
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Date: 2007-06-21 12:31 am (UTC)teary-eyed
Date: 2008-02-14 10:26 pm (UTC)Well, it's just perfet.
Long Live "Minty" Ryan!
Re: teary-eyed
Date: 2008-02-14 10:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-22 11:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-22 11:39 pm (UTC)I promise, I write much better now.
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Date: 2008-08-22 11:52 pm (UTC)it's not bad writing to me. i'm not gonna go there, not after your most recent post, but i did like it. besides, i've been in a "people react negatively to coming out" mood in the last few days. like i kinda wanna read that one verse you have where matt's like HOLY CRAP I HAD SEX WITH A DUDE, and trey's like 0.0 but like i said, my computer is all lol DENIED.
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Date: 2008-08-22 11:59 pm (UTC)